Week 15

23rd November

This is the day I have written all these blogs. I have written it from how I remembered it as I never kept any kind of diary. Everyone keeps telling me I will forget how bad it actually was. Yes I might forget the severity of the sickness but I don't ever think I will forget the feeling of lonliness and unhappiness.

Having a baby is meant to be one of the happiest moments of your life but hyperemesis quickely takes any happiness away from you.

Everyone keeps asking why I am not excited - how can I be excited when I have this horrible illness which at the moment is just being masked by drugs? I can't allow myself to get excited when every single day I am putting our baby at risk by taking drugs for sickness.

I don't want sympathy from anyone, all I want is for people to understand what hyperemesis does to peoples lifes. I have been lucky as so far Steve, my family and my friends have stuck by me, not everyones lives stay the same. Many relationships break down due to hyperemesis, many people lose friends and family.

This blog has only been about how I felt during the last few weeks. I know and will never forget how it affected others too, especially Steve. He has sat through night after night of vomiting, he has gone out to the shops to get me anything that I would possibly eat/drink, he put up with me shouting and blaming him for everything, he listened to me crying for no reason and he even missed football!!!

Mum, Dad and Emma also helped me a lot and I caused them a lot of worry. If it wasn't for them I wouldn't have phoned NHS 24, I wouldn't have gone in to hospital when I did and there is a big possibility I wouldn't be here now.